On 3rd May I called my Mums’ good friend to ask her about something. She asked me how I was and I told her that things had been a bit crazy for the last few weeks. I’d been dealing with a lot of miscommunication and various other issues that had stemmed from misunderstandings. She then tells me that we have just come out of Mercury retrograde and that it has just gone direct. This means for the past three weeks Mercury has appeared to be going backwards, but what this means for me (and possibly even some of you) is that everything that could have gone wrong – has gone wrong.
So I started to look into it more and apparently the last few weeks have been connected to issues around money, miscommunication, technical issues with computers etc – all of which I have been lucky enough to have been dealing with in abundance these last few weeks.
I found it funny that the day after we come out of this astrologically turbulent time, I then learn about all the things not to do in this period. For example, one is advised not to start something new until the to-do list is finished – I wish I had known that before. Another piece of advice is not to start a project without proper solid instructions. The list goes on!
Fundamentally, looking back on the last three weeks – maybe all these things were meant to happen. Maybe I wasn’t meant to find out what I should do and what I should not do because I needed to make those mistakes in order to assess the way I do things and ask myself how I can do better; how can I develop my business in a way that I am being true to myself and also making money and growing my business at the same time?
These are really hard questions for me. Yes, quite often I feel like quitting and going to pick grapes in a community somewhere on the other side of the world. I care so much about what I am doing and work so hard that sometimes I wonder if I lose myself and what really is important. I have to ask myself why am I doing this? What are the reasons that I choose to do what I do? Am I living a life true to myself? Am I am doing what makes me happy? Am I combining business and creativity? Am I finding a way where I can live a life that is balanced? Am I realising a way to make a life out of something I love? Am I growing and changing myself? Am I finding the positive in every hard situation?
Maybe when I am much older I will look back at this completely crazy journey and feel that I want to thank the gods for everything that went wrong. We shall see…
But I guess what I am learning now is that it’s really important for me to chill out and take stock of everything that I have achieved – so that I am not stressed out and can take each situation in my stride and deal with it in the least reactive way possible. So that I can allow situations in life to arise and see them as a learning curve. I know now that the real test isn’t when things are going swimmingly, but when something happens that really tries us. That tests our ability to stay centred, helping us to not react to the situations that come up in life. I think if there was only one thing I could take from my yoga practice – it would be the gift to be able to stay equanimous when things happen which we can’t control. It’s hard and I am yet to master it but I am trying my best. So that when challenging situations arise, for example, Mercury retrograde happens, and everything goes wrong I can allow these situations to happen without letting them affect my physical emotional and mental health. I guess it’s not about stopping issues arising, we can never stop a Mercury retrograde, but we can learn not to react so much so that these things can happen and pass us by without causing us too much distress or pain.